Summer Goals And Accountability Challenge
By Rory Stern | June 30, 2009
Welcome back!
Today I’d like you to join me in delcaring your goals and intentions for the summer. Each year, on this very day, I think about summer as a fresh start to bring new beginnings. And for the last few years, I have not really accomplished everything that I had hoped for..
I am NOT going to beat myself up over this.
I could easily spend a lot of time doing that!
Last summer my family had more unscheduled and unnecessary trips than we could have ever imagined,. That dramtically affected the work I was able to get done. But that’s neither here nor there…
Today, I’d like to share my goals with you and in return I’d like to give you the chance to be my support partner in a "challenege " where we help one another and get more done. The bottom line is that when you declare your intentions and share them out loud – there is a greater chance you will get them done. On top of that, by sharing your goals with others – you create built-in accountability and motivation to get things done.
Here’s How It Works:
Each day or (whenever I update), I’ll share progress of my goals and I’ll ask for you to do the same in the comments section. Success comes from sharing your goals and declaring your intentions. I hope you will join me so that we can all get the most of the summer months.
Your goals can be personal, business, or family…
My Goals:
- Take weekends off from work
- Create more content for ADHDFamilyOnline.com
- Outline, structure, and complete 2 reports
- Finalize arrangements with experts and contributors
As the summer goes one, I will refine and update (and get more specific) on what these goals mean to me, and how I intend to accomplish them. I’d love to hear your thoughts…but more importantly I’d love for you to share your goals with us!
PS: If you didn’t get a chance to hear our latest ADHD Family Teleseminar on ADHD Family Friendly Summer Tips, you can still register to access the replay here: http://www.adhdfamilyteleseminars.com
Topics: Goals, Uncategorized | 19 Comments »
ABC News: What Can You Learn From A Rogue Music Teacher?
By Rory Stern | June 17, 2009
Being different in a world that has certain expectations tends to get a lot of criticism, especially when you are not a recognized celebrity or superstar (athlete, musician, etc…). But when we suddenly find someone to be an inspiration, their quirkiness is accepted and often applauded.
Make sure you watch this video to see how one person truly can make a difference (and do so by standing out from the crowd and strumming to a different beat)….
I don’t know about you, but it is stories like this that make me want to jump up and take on the world. Too many times we see people who are different as odd or strange. And I can honestly tell you, being a kid in grade school -- I might have found this to be strange.
But then again, I am not a singer and I don’t have confidence in my singing ability.
Lessons From A Music Teacher
- You can stand out from the crowd and be accepted and successful in a system that has very specific (and often unreal expectations).
- It takes a certain type of person / student to be comfortable enough to get on stage and sing solos (or stand in front of a crowd and give a presentation at the office)
- Encourage your differences or a child’s unique talents, because you just never know when they might blossom and inspire someone else.
There are plenty of lessons we can all learn about supporting a loved one who is different. For me, this isn’t just about the work I do with families affected by ADHD. This video is all about inspiring life and inspiring success -- taking changes…
I really hope you will inspire someone to be themselves and give them hope that they might someday change the world.
After all, one person changing one life is far more dramatic than anything else I know.
Topics: Advocacy | No Comments »
2009 ADHD Family Summit
By Rory Stern | April 29, 2009
I’ve been a little quiet these last few months as I have been preparing a very special event. Today I’d like to share with you the 2009 ADHD Family Summit.
Starting this coming Monday, May 4th at 9 PM EDT / 6 PM PDT, you’ll be able to hear from some of the leading experts on ADHD. As you might suspect, the focus of this interview series is to help share important information and provide strategies and support to the entire family.
Far too many times, an individual with ADHD is expected to be the one that bears the burden of change. They are the ones who can sometimes be made to feel isolated or is if they are the problem.
Yes, people with ADHD struggle, but to successfully support an individual with ADHD, we must all become better informed and more aware of what it takes to help our loved ones.
Registration is open now http://www.ADHDFamilySummit.com
Here are just some of the speakers and topics we’ll be covering
- Theresa Cerulli, MD – The ADHD Brain & Co-existing Conditions
- David Giwerc, MCC – IS ADHD Who You Are Or Something You Have?
- James T. Webb, PhD – Understanding ADHD & Giftedness
- Tara McGillicuddy, SCAC – Women and Girls With ADHD
- Jennifer Koretsky – Self-Care Strategies For Parents And Adults With ADHD
- Kenny Handelman, MD – Understanding ADHD Medications
We also have a very special guest, Alexis Martin Neely, who will be speaking with us about how to protect our families and loved ones in case of an emergency.
Don’t miss this event!
2009 ADHD Family Summit
http://www.ADHDFamilySummit.com <============ Click Here For All The Details
Topics: ADD, ADHD | No Comments »
Children With ADHD: When Is A Child Too Young To Be Diagnosed With ADHD?
By Rory Stern | February 18, 2009
I’ve been getting a lot of questions lately about very young children being diagnosed with ADHD… Parents want to know:
- Can my child be diagnosed at <insert age here>?
- How do I know if it’s ADHD or not?
- What should I be looking for?
- How can I help my child?
These are all great questions to ask! Unfortunately, like so many things when it comes to parenting children with ADHD, there is just no ONE size-fits-all answer!
According to the DSM-IV criteria symptoms of ADHD must be present before age 7.
BUT – we still know that kids are still developing at that young of an age. Furthermore, according to Dr. Daniel Amen, our brains continue to develop until we are 25 years-old. So what it is then? What is the answer?
I’m beginning to sound like a bit of a broken record, but ADHD looks differently in every single individual. On top of that, there are so many different conditions that share the major symptoms of ADHD, as well as factors that can mimic symptoms of ADHD.
To Answer The Question
The diagnostic criteria for ADHD are more of a guideline. They are NOT by any means the determining factor that definitely makes a diagnosis.
For me, I don’t personally like to officially diagnose a child before age 7 or 8, and even then that can be a bit beyond my comfort zone. Instead, I offer you this perspective:
If your child is showing some signs and symptoms of ADHD, then act accordingly. Regardless of a formal diagnosis, there are still strategies and supports that we can put in place to help your child be successful. There are tools we can rely on to make life a little less stressful and overwhelming for you, your child, and the entire family.
So yet again, I ask you to consider the diagnosis a piece of the puzzle. Focus more on the behaviors that you are seeing, and consider how those are causing problems.
As your child gets older, and things become a bit more clear, then we can start to identify whether or not it really is ADHD.
Tell Us What You Think!
Have a different perspective? We love to hear from our readers. Let us know what you think about this post by leaving a comment below.
PS – Have you gotten your ADHD Essentials Audio Kit yet? Sign Up Today, it’s FREE
Topics: Children, Parenting | 1 Comment »
ADHD Comorbid Conditions And Complications
By Rory Stern | February 16, 2009
When it comes to understanding ADHD, one of the most commonly overlooked or unknown areas discussed is the laundry list of related conditions that tend to co-exist or co-occur. In the medical field, they are referred to as “comorbid conditions,” but all it really means is that an individual can meet the criteria for more than one diagnosis.
According to Wikipedia, comorbid conditions refer to “the presence of more than one diagnosis occurring in an individual at the same time.”
In ADHD, it is very common for an individual to meet the criteria for both ADHD and one of the following conditions:
- Depression
- Anxiety
- Bipolar Disorder
Now, things get a little tricky (or complicated as I like to call it) because, these “co-existing” conditions can often mask one another as well as account for or even cause one condition to look like the other.
That’s why it is so important for people to see a specialist who understands the complexities of ADHD in order to make an accurate diagnosis.
Now, if this isn’t already complicated enough, figuring out the right diagnosis can be even more difficult (especially in children) because the following list of conditions share many of the same symptoms as ADHD:
- Bipolar Disorder
- ADHD
- Depression
- Sensory Processing Disorder
- Non-Verbal Learning Disability
- Giftedness
- Anxiety
- PTSD
- Normal Child Development
The list goes on and on, but the truth of the matter is that the major symptoms of hyperactivity, impulsivity, and inattention are more common than people realize. They are only indicators that something is going on… They are indicators that someone needs support.
Bottom Line?
Honestly, this information really just scratches the surface to understanding ADHD, co-existing conditions, and the many complications that can mimic symptoms of ADHD. We haven’t even addressed the fact that some of these conditions can cause someone (who does NOT have ADHD) to appear as if they do have ADHD.
Not to mention, these complications can also mask the fact that someone struggling with anxiety (per se) might actually have ADHD.
What You Can Do?
When trying to figure out what is really going on with your child or a loved one, focus more on the specific challenges or struggles that an individual faces at the moment. What is getting in their way? Or causing problems?
Once you start with that, the right professionals can help you get to the underlying cause or contributing factors.
Comments? Questions?
I’d like you to join me for the next ADHD Family Teleseminar. Each Sunday night get in-depth on topics just like this. To sign up and get your questions answered, just visit http://www.ADHDFamilyTeleseminars.com
Topics: Awareness | 2 Comments »
ADHD Parenting Tips: It’s Never Too Late For Change
By Rory Stern | February 11, 2009
I want to shout out loud – “It’s NEVER too late for change.” It’s NEVER too late to make a difference in your child’s life. And it’s certainly NEVER too late to start supporting and encouraging their differences!
Yet, I have to caution everyone that just because it is never too late… that doesn’t mean we will see change overnight, within a week, or within a few months.
Sure, my goal with everyone is to implement strategies right away so you can start seeing change almost immediately. BUT, that doesn’t mean there won’t be some ups and downs.
Today – more so than ever – we are looking for a quick fix demand and expect a quick fix.
I suppose it’s NOT entirely unreasonable to want that. After all, the demands on our time is at an all time high. Technology is advancing so rapidly – that our world (family, work, school) expects almost immediate results.
But we cannot expect that from our children. While society has changed, raising a family has stayed relatively the same (or should I say has the same demands)…
My Point Is This…
Think of who your child is right now. Think of how old he or she is, and how long it has taken to develop the habits we now observe as problematic or concerning. In fact, the same works for their good habits…
With all of the families I support, the same applies across the board. It doesn’t matter if it’s the parent or the child… We need to think of the years that it took to develop the habits or behaviors we see right now. We need to be mindful that these habits developed over time and did NOT pop up over night.
That’s where the answer exists: TIME!
Even when we intervene at a very early age, we are faced with habits that have been reinforced time and time again. It’s going to take time to help support your child and help them develop new habits.
Tell Us What You Think!
Have a different perspective? We love to hear from our readers. Let us know what you think about this post by leaving a comment below.
PS – Have you gotten your ADHD Essentials Audio Kit yet? Sign Up Today, it’s FREE
Topics: Children, Parenting | 1 Comment »
ADHD Debate: Have You Taken A Side?
By Rory Stern | February 10, 2009
I almost titled this post, “Are You Passionate Enough About Success?” But the more I thought about my message today – the more I realized it’s NOT necessarily about success. It’s about taking a side – and being passionate about that side.
Too Many People Sit On The Fence
A mentor of mine really pushes people to make a commitment, Yes I am interested or No, I am not. Either way, he just wants to be involved with people who can make a decision and NOT sit on the fence.
>>>>That’s what today’s post is about!<<<<
There are a lot of debates amongst society, and within the ADHD community, about ADHD as a diagnosis
- Gift versus Curse
- Whole Vs. Part
- Medication Vs. Alternatives
- Doctors Vs. Parents
- Diagnosis Vs. Condition
- And I’m Sure Many More…
Where you stand on these debates doesn’t so much matter to me, as long as you are passionate about your side of the argument.
Let me clarify that… My personal view is to approach differences in people, and to help them get the supports, resources, tools, and strategies to be successful in life. I don’t believe ADHD is a gift nor do I believe it is a curse. Instead, I actually believe that is a part of who the person is – and with the right supports, tools, resources, etc… a person with ADHD can be just as successful as anyone else.
Now this approach upsets some people, and at the same time, it hits home for other people.
That’s What We’re Talking About
We will all have different opinions about ADHD. That’s just life when it comes to a condition that is hotly contested, debated, and largely quite misunderstood.
For me, I’ll engage in conversation and debate with anyone about ADHD as a condition so long as they are informed and provide support to people, rather than striking them down.
Beyond that, we can agree to disagree.
And That’s What I Want For You
People who are successful in life, and in managing their challenges are very passionate or at least strongly opinionated about their perspective on things.
So if you are struggling to figure out how ADHD is impacting yourself, your child, a spouse, loved one, or friend — I’m going to ask you to find a side and get involved.
There’s nothing more dangerous than sitting on the fence and going back and forth. It just leads to confusion, blaming, and negativity all around…
What Do You Believe?
I want to hear from you! Please let me know where you stand on the great debates of ADHD. Tell me what really gets you passionate about living with ADHD, struggling with ADHD, or supporting someone with ADHD.
Even if I don’t agree with you, show me your passion and I’ll respect what you have to say!
PS. – Will you join me for the next ADHD Family Teleseminar? This Sunday we will be talking about ADHD Co-existing Conditions And Complications!
Topics: ADHD, Awareness, Success | 1 Comment »
ADHD Alternative Treatment: Finding Out What Really Works
By Rory Stern | February 9, 2009
Last night we kicked off the inaugural ADHD Family Teleseminars by talking about ADHD Alternative Treatments. If not the most frequently requested topic, it is definitely amongst the top 2 or 3, especially by parents of children with ADHD.
No matter where you stand on the medication debate, considering alternative treatments is critical to successfully supporting someone with ADHD or to managing your own ADHD.
Why?
Last night I shared with my listeners that even when choosing to use medication, “alternatives” really are an integral part of successful treatment. You see, for me, ADHD alternative treatment involves anything we do or use that is non-medication based!
Some of what we talked about:
- Neurofeedback / Biofeedback
- Diet
- Supplements
- Strategies
- Hypnotherapy
My readers asked a lot of really great questions, and I think the most common one of them all was:
What ADHD alterantive treatments actually work?
This is a great question, and we answered it last night. There is no one alternative treatment for ADHD that works better than the next.
ADHD is a complex diagnosis that is never one size fits all. It is different in everyone it touches, and that’s why next week we’ll be covering the topic: ADHD Co-existing Conditions & Complications.
We’d love for you to join us. Simply visit http://www.ADHDFamilyTeleseminars.com to register. You’ll even get your chance to ask your most pressing question.
Have a suggested topic? We love hearing from you. Just contact us and let us know what your most pressing question is.
Topics: ADHD, Alternatives, Teleseminar | No Comments »
ADHD Report: Michael Phelps Takes Responsibility For His Actions
By Rory Stern | February 6, 2009
Earlier this week Michael Phelps made headlines when some photos of him were released to the media, that showed the record-breaking Olympian engaged in (what looked like) smoking pot from a bong.
When I first heard the news, I started to wonder whether or not Michael’s ADHD would come into the spotlight. In the ADHD community, there has been tremendous buzz about Michael’s accomplishments in despite his being diagnosed with ADHD many years ago.
Now, I’ve wanted to comment on this for just about a week, but I decided to wait to see the reactions of others.
Some of the fallout:
“Regrettable behavior” and “bad judgment.”
- Phelps did a dumb thing
- Former President’s smoked marijuana in their 20s and managed to do just fine in life
Losing sponsors and being suspended
Kellogg’s drops sponsorship, and 3-months suspension from USA Swimming.
Little Mention Of ADHD
For the most part, there was very little mention of this activity and a link to ADHD or impulsivity… Most people focused on poor judgment and his statement of “regrettable behavior.” I am thrilled about that… The focus should NOT be on ADHD.
But then, I happened upon a comment where ADHD was the central focus (or suggested focus) of why Michael engaged in such behavior. Sure, we could argue that smoking pot was the result of impulsivity (and even ADHD)… but we weren’t there.
And aside from that — what’s the point of saying it was related to ADHD? He did it, he took responsibility for it, and his life goes on.
One might argue that he might never have admitted it if he hadn’t been caught or if he wasn’t in the public eye. But who cares? There are (dear I say) millions of teens who experiment with drugs. Some probably have ADHD… Some probably experiment because of their “impulsivity” or other related ADHD characteristics… And still some kids without the slightest hint of ADHD also experiment with illegal drugs.
Here’s My Take:
I don’t care one way or the other about the circumstances surrounding Michael’s behavior or experimentation with marijuana. Quite frankly, I think any debate about whether or not this activity is linked to ADHD is totally irrelevant and unnecessary.
Why? What purpose does it serve the greater good of society? He made a mistake… And if I may, he’s pretty darn successful. Let’s focus on that! Let’s focus on the fact that he made his decisions… He got caught… He apologized… He has consequences… And his life will go on…
Are We Overlooking The Most Important Factor?
For those people who want to debate Michael’s behavior and any link to ADHD related behaviors… I ask you this:
- Have you considered the amount of pressure on him thus far in his life?
- Do you have any idea what he has sacrificed to achieve Olympic glory and success?
I don’t know about you, but I’m pretty darn impressed with what Michael has overcome in life (ADHD or otherwise).
For the record, I am NOT excusing his behavior or condoning it. But I am a bit of a realist. This young man has faced adversity, overcome challenges, succeeded in life when many thought he would fail… and so much more!
Let’s NOT forget that being diagnosed with ADHD is just a small piece of who a person is. It does not define him, nor does it account for all of his decisions, behaviors, or challenges.
Perhaps his decision to allegedly engage in this behavior was simply Michael’s way of being his age for once (right or wrong)!
And maybe…just maybe…people who see this behavior as related to ADHD are just skeptics waiting for him to fail. I suppose if you wait long enough for something — it’s bound to happen.
Tell Us What You Think!
Have a different perspective? We love to hear from our readers. Let us know what you think about this post by leaving a comment below.
PS – Have you gotten your ADHD Essentials Audio Kit yet? Sign Up Today, it’s FREE
Topics: ADD, ADHD, Decision Making | 1 Comment »
ADHD Treatment Information: Who Can You Listen To And Actually Believe?
By Rory Stern | February 5, 2009
I became a passionate advocate in the ADHD community for one reason and ONLY one reason.
I wanted to make sure that people were getting the right information from the right people.
It had been my experience through graduate school and while training to become a psychologist (which I stepped away from*) that most people did NOT understand ADHD or what it took to parent a child with ADHD. Like most people, there are a good number of professionals who only understand ADHD as it is characterized by it’s major symptoms:
- Hyperactivity
- Impulsivity
- Inattention
Unfortunately however, these “major symptoms” are only the tip of the iceberg. To really understand ADHD, you have to dig down so much deeper and understand a lot more about ADHD – as a condition and as a way of life.
It also helps if you have an understanding of human dynamics, child development, biology, relationships, and more… This is NOT an area where just anyone with an opinion should be walking in and giving advice — at least not to parents of children with ADHD.
Who Do You Believe?
During my training (and even today as a coach), I hear from lots of families that they won’t go back to a therapist, psychologist, or psychiatrist because of how they were treated. It’s very unfortunate!
But — it happens. And I need you to know that it happens. While people have good intentions, that is NOT enough. You deserve better, and you deserve to know exactly how to find a competent individual to support you, your family, your child, or loved one affected by ADHD.
I am here today to hopefully empower you to want more and to expect more from the people who will support you! There are a lot of people with opinions out there about ADHD and how to manage it and support someone who might be struggling with ADHD.
Friends / family / loved ones / strangers / parents / parents of children with ADHD… You name it — someone has an agenda. Even me! I’ll be the first to admit that. But hopefully you know that my agenda is to get the right information out to the people who need it the most. It’s NOT to bash people or hold people back.
Be Cautious As Your Proceed
Each and every day, I come across people sharing information about ADHD who truly don’t get it. Oh believe me, they think they get it…and they’ll do their best to convince you that they get it. Please be careful!!
It’s a struggle, and it really hurts when I see good families and good people following advice that is completely inaccurate or unfounded!
This is the problem with the Internet and people being able to share information to anyone who is willing to listen.
Follow These Few Steps, And You’ll Do Ok!
- What is the person’s background?
- How long have they been involved in the ADHD community?
- What do they believe about ADHD?
- How do they help people with ADHD?
- Do they have any formal training?
**Most of all – do the answers to these questions match your needs, interests, and expectations. If they don’t, then you’ve got to keep looking. I won’t proclaim to be the right person for everyone, and if I’m not, let me help you find someone who will match what you are looking for.
There are absolutely good people out there to help you, but there are also people out there who try and try and try….and they do mean well….but I have found they are lacking some fundamental basics that can mean the difference between short-term relief and long-lasting relief.
If I’m Your Guy:
Because I want you to get the right information, I need to share two very important upcoming events.
#1 – ADHD Family Teleseminar
We start a free weekly teleseminar this coming Sunday, February 8th 2009 at 8 PM EST. You can get the details here.
#2 – Ask Dr. Cerulli
Join me as I interview psychiatrist (and my friend and colleague), Dr. Theresa Cerulli. Each month we get on the phone and answer your most pressing questions. Details here.
Topics: ADD, ADHD, Advocacy, Awareness | 3 Comments »