What Are Weaknesses Anyway?

Broken… Disabled… Lazy… Crazy… No good… Outcast… Disappointment..

These are some pretty powerful (and incredibly negative) ways to describe people or talk about others.  I’m sure just seeing these words gave you some sort of reaction?  Now imagine how using these words – c’mon, we all do – impact the people around us?

Now how do they impact our children or loved ones who might be a little different than what is expected of them?

For the individual with ADHD, there is a lot of “negativity” associated with the condition.  In fact, one very well-known ADHD expert has said there are no positive attributes associated with the condition…  And I am sure there are plenty of other people out there who say it (and believe it) too.

ADHD Is NOT The Person

Today we are NOT going to debate whether or not there are positive or negative qualities directly related to ADHD.  Who cares?  Yea…I said it and I am sure to get some flack for it too.  But that’s also the point.  ADHD is merely a piece of the puzzle, and I am beyond convincing that every single person has plenty of positive attributes.

It’s just finding them can sometimes be difficult…

Consider this for a moment.  If we were all meant to be good at the same things…how we actually accomplish anything?  Where the fun be?  How we would evolve, invent, and create new and exciting technologies or advancements?

The Weakness Is Not The Person

Just as we all have positive qualities…we also have “negative” qualities or weaknesses as so many people refer to them.  But what exactly is a weakness?  And why do we focus on them so much?

Think about these questions if you want…but what I really want you to think about is the idea of ‘relative weaknesses.’  We can only have weaknesses in comparison to other strengths.  And when you compare…weaknesses are ONLY relative to our strengths.

Does that make sense?

When a child struggles with Math, but excels at Biology or History, does that mean we should focus on the Math being a problem?  Or should we celebrate the fact that they are great in Biology?

Do we get upset because our children can get A’s and B’s in these classes, and then end up with a C or D in others?

What if your child earned all B’s across the board?  Would we be happier?  Still frustrated?

How about the athlete who is gifted in one sport but not another?  What if they never discovered their talent in one sport?

Everything is relative, and we seem to ignore that.  A weakness cannot exist without a strength on the other end.

My challenge to you today is to remove these words from your vocabulary, and to begin looking at your children…your loved ones…your spouse…partner…whoever NOT in comparison to other people…BUT in comparison to themselves.  NOT in comparison to other people, but in comparison to their abilities…

Normal does NOT exist.  Most people are NOT good at everything, and they are NOT intended to be either.

I know I have plenty of weaknesses, and I am well aware of them…  There might even be some I don’t see as weaknesses, but they might be obvious to you.