Comments on: 7 Life Lessons Learned From Building My Kids Swing Set

By: deb

deb — Wed, 29 Jul 2009 03:05:26 +0000

kids are fun to play in our garden, so i put patio swings, it look so nice in our outside patio with plants and trees, it also serve as resting place with my kid after playing some enjoyable activities.

By: Lisa Lauffer

Lisa Lauffer — Thu, 23 Jul 2009 01:51:15 +0000

Thanks, Rory, for reminding us what’s important: to live life fully and with grace. I especially love the part about allowing your kids to be part of the process–they will probably remember this experience for the rest of their lives! What a great gift you’ve given them!

By: GILLIAN R. PRYSTUPA

GILLIAN R. PRYSTUPA — Thu, 23 Jul 2009 01:37:32 +0000

Taking the Deep Breath, was certainly productive !
Guess most of us have been there, particularly us Perfectionist types!
Thankfully your children are not that aware of the whys & wherefores, hence really for us Perfectionists, we’re merely ‘over-reacting’ at our own performance, in other words, we’ve damaged our own perception of ourselves! Your children will be oblivious & shall enjoy your thoughtfulness enormously, & you’ll also enjoy their pleasure!

By: Diane

Diane — Wed, 22 Jul 2009 20:34:41 +0000

I really empathize with what you are going through and totally support it, although if you said you finally hired someone to put it all together, I’d respect that, too. My husband is a do-it-your-self person, and also a bit frugal, but he was daunted by the swingset job and had the people who delivered it, put it up. But either way: children love to swing. The motion of it, the delight of accomplishment, the social interactions they will have on it–the fun.

Why do people forget so much, about fun? When my kids see a swingset–and they are 11 and 15–they put down their electronic games, and run for it, and play on it.

You are building more than a swingset. You’re investing in your children’s joy and health, and fun.

As someone with ADHD, I read what you said about making the mistake, and then thinking, “How can I make this work”–and how distracted you got with all the kids around you—and I remembered how that kind of thing used to make me crazy; make me frazzled enough to feel enraged.

I don’t know what made me learn this, but I finally decided to suspend time. To say, “When you have young children, time has to go slower. It has to.” At least, it does for people who have the luxury to make their children a priority for a few precious years. You have that opportunity–that blessing—so go for it; full force!!

By: Lauren

Lauren — Wed, 22 Jul 2009 18:10:39 +0000

I think it is always interesting as a fellow parent to share anecdotal experiences with others. Especially because we all know how hard it can be day to day. However I like the follow up of 7 things I learned. I don’t so much like the “I screwed up”. I don’t think you screwed up at all. I think you are an awesome dad and “person” for at least attempting to put the swingset together yourself and you undoubtedly learned a lot including being more prepared the next time you consider such a task. Most people would have paid someone else to do it vs taking a shot realizing it would not be easy. The choice of words should be geared toward the eventual long-term outcome that will indeed be success. My Mom always told me growing up that even if I failed (or was not totally successful) all that mattered was that I tried my very best! I tell my kids that same mantra every day. Don’t bother trying unless you will try your best! That might be a better title than “I screwed up”. With parents just as children, talking about the hardships/efforts we have to endure daily is our life reality. It helps then to focus on the positives and hopefully we transfer those positive thoughts and theories to our children. Just my view. And kudos to you for going for it! I am sure the kids will be even more appreciative after all the hard work you yourself put into it. That alone is a good lesson that too many kids today are not learning as so many parents hire out help for everything our parents used to do from cutting the lawn to cleaning the house. Not me and I am proud to say that my 13 year old daughter can now cut the lawn by herself when asked. In return when she begs me for some Ugg boots THIS Winter I will highly consider it despite their ridiculously high cost thanks to her great contribution to our household. I still think my kids have it much easier than I did growing up and we do everything ourselves! Enjoy that swingset! Lauren

By: Brenda Jackson

Brenda Jackson — Wed, 22 Jul 2009 12:53:27 +0000

Rory, the comments you made in this article are correct. We do things to build memories, and not about us all the time. The main idea is self-discipline. You may have had a bad time with the swing set, but you are also in a learning experience of how to handle situations in the future and how to help others and advise them through your experience. Sometimes we have to take the time and search for the positive in a situation. Years on down the road you will think about this and smile about the memory of the swing set. You can share this with your children and they will know through all the bad times you had with this, daddy must have really loved us to go through this secenario. Stay focused and you can accomplish things you never dreamed possible, because you are not a quitter. Keep up the good work.